Fake It Till You Make It…(but don’t forget who you really are)

I’ve spent the past years of my life in the heart of Hollywood – the town known quite literally for people making their success by pretending to be other people. Everyone is trying to “play the part” to “catch their big break” but, how much do we sacrifice ourselves to achieve these dreams and goals?

Please do not misunderstand me, here. I am not bashing on the industry. I am a true believer that performing (acting, singing, dancing, producing, etc.) are all bona fide art forms and that it takes a tremendous amount of talent to embody them at their potential. They have deeply moved and inspired me to points I didn’t know where tangible by complete strangers. All I am asking is: at what point to we stop the act and remember how to be ourselves?

Example: I met this guy the other day and in the middle of conversation it came up that he was from England. I then asked why he didn’t have an accent. Turns out, this guy had been faking an American accent the whole time because he doesn’t like how people make judgements based on how he talks… What the hell?! First of all, what guy doesn’t want to be seen as “the hot guy with the accent” but secondly, what’s wrong with where you’re from?

I was raised in the middle of Cow Town, U.S.A. There were probably 4 dairies within 3 miles of my house and, at one time, the fanciest store we had to shop at was a Sears. There’s nothing wrong with wanting something more or different from where you came from, nor of being proud of it and staying with what you love. I think you gotta know where you’re coming from to know where you’re going. For better or worse, these experiences have each played their part – big or small – to mold you into the person you see in the mirror. Acknowledge that. If you love it, keep it. If you don’t like it, change it. Find your fit, whatever and wherever it is. So many times I come across people who are trying to “fit the mold” of what they believed was “what it takes” and ended up being completely miserable because they had lost site of what they were doing and why they were doing it.

Please don’t mistake this as me saying “don’t hustle” because, baby, you gotta. Chances are there ain’t no one in this town (or any) that’s gonna hand you all your hopes and dreams on a silver platter… And if they do, I’d think twice before just taking it – nothing in life is really free. All I’m saying is, we don’t encourage enough that  it all starts with believing in yourself. Believing you’re enough and you can do it if you really want it bad enough. And also, if it’s not working out, is it really what you want? Is it really what you need?

I think it’s important to set personal boundaries, with yourself and with others. If you’re actually willing to sell your soul to the devil for that gig/position/person you’ve been killing yourself over, you just might find yourself doing it – feeling dead inside once you get it and realize you’ve got nothing left but that one thing you’ve finally achieved (hope it’s worth it… and hey, maybe it is. But then you won’t feel dead. You’ll be ecstatic. Kudos to you for getting there)

You can’t count on people not to lie, and things to always be what they appear at face value. The world around you (and inside you for that matter) are constantly changing and evolving. You can only know what you have for certain because it’s genuine and it’s yours. So, be honest. At least with yourself. Because that’s the only thing you should believe is real.